Gossip less

by Nicole



My blended family lives in a fabulous town north of Boston called Manchester by-the-Sea. We're near the beach, we have a wonderful school system and I know that every time my kids are playing in the park, there are other parents looking out for them. I feel incredibly blessed! In most ways, I love the small town feel.
As with probably every small town, since everyone knows each other, let's just say that sometimes, it can be a breeding ground for a little gossip!

Pat and I divorced and remained in the same town, settling walking distance from each other. I'm sure some people thought that was strange, but for our family, it worked. The transition for the kids was far less drastic than if one of us had moved away, and it allowed for Pat to remain very involved with the boys. Somedays he might be very busy, but since living so close, he could stop by for a short visit. Also, his proximity allowed for impromptu dinners, last minute pickups from medical appointments, school activities and playdates. Right now, with Pat out of town for work, I'm realizing that his role of last minute help here and there was quite significant!

How did we manage to go through divorce, and life after divorce, all while remaining in the same town?... Pat dating women that I know, my entering a new relationship and having a child, sharing friends and sharing family events and more..

We gossip less, and respect each other more.

I'm not saying there weren't times along the way that were awkward.
Actually, it was more common for other people to feel awkward at first. Family and friends were unsure,
Who should be invited to this or to that?--Should one not be invited if the other is attending?

I think it was us avoiding negative talk that helped people feel more comfortable being around us together after we were divorced.

Of course people offer me bait,
"Oh, it must drive you crazy when..."
 I bite my tongue, even if something does drive me crazy... and try to gossip less.

I love this quote:
"So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip." Will Rogers

An article on respecting your ex-spouse
http://health.howstuffworks.com/pregnancy-and-parenting/healthy-co-parenting1.htm








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